Category Archives: Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop

Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire!


This post is for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop #3.) A lie you told. I also linked up #5.) What was the occasion? Write about the last time you stayed in a hotel here.

I made a friend at school in Kindergarten. I think her name was Amber, but I’m not sure. One day I told Amber that I was going to be having a birthday party at Brady’s Run Park. I was not. What was actually going on was that our church was having the Sunday School Picnic at the park fairly close to my birthday. I knew that it wasn’t my birthday party…but I told her that anyway. I had forgotten all about it until we were at the Sunday School Picnic. Our family was at the shelter when a car pulled up. A little girl with a wrapped present got out of the car. Oops…busted! I had to tell my mom, and Amber, and her mom that I had lied about my birthday. I really don’t recall getting into a lot of trouble. In fact I remember our moms telling us that we could have a play date and maybe I could even ride the bus home with Amber one day (which was exciting for me because I was a “walker”). Then Amber and her mom got back into the car with the present and drove away. I don’t have any memories of Amber after that. I know that we never had our play date and sometime before the end of the year she moved away (probably to a place where people tell the truth). Amber did not come to my real birthday party that year. I’m not sure if it’s because we didn’t invite her, or if she just didn’t believe me, or if she had already moved away by then. I have absolutely no idea why I lied. It was very out of character for me. In fact while preparing for my Mommy’s Piggy Tales posts I asked my mom if she had any cute stories of me at this age. She told me that I was such a good girl all the time, I never did anything wrong, and there just isn’t anything funny about a little girl who’s always behaving herself.

The thing that I find weird about this story is…how did two 5 year old girls get the details right? How did I tell Amber the exact day, time, and place with shelter number to come to? How did she then relay that information to her mother…correctly? Why did her mom just take her to a birthday party without there being a written invitation and without speaking to my mother first? I have no idea! But aside from the lying, those were some great communication skills at work!

This post was originally included in the post Dancing in a box for my Mommy’s Piggy Tale series. That original post has been edited to create this new post.

My Piggy Tales:
*My Birth Story: I’m always late!
*Ages 3-5: Dancing in a box
*Age 5 Kindergarten: Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire!
*Age 6 First Grade: There’s a bra in my lunchbox!
*Age 7 Second Grade: Bossy Wheels and Shady Deals
*Age 8 Third Grade: I will not talk in class
*Age 9 Fourth Grade: I didn’t really need those fingers anyway!
*Age 10 5th Grade: Nothing’s Scary in the Fifth Grade
*Age 11 6th Grade: Jenny Got Ran Over by her Grandma
*Age 12 7th Grade: Youth Camp Stinks
*Age 13 8th Grade: “Talent” Show
*Age 14 9th Grade: (N)O Christmas Tree
*Age 15 10th Grade: The Newsboys Wouldn’t Ditch Their Friends
*Age 16 11th Grade: Acrophobia Gets You the Good Seats
*Age 17 12th Grade: In School Suspension

My Young Adult Years
*Dreams and Aspirations: The Long Road There
*Friends and Fellowship: Friends Don’t Get Friends Grounded
*My First Job
*How I Met Cool Daddy Part 1
*How I Met Cool Daddy Part 2
*Colonel Mustard on a Rollercoaster with a Plastic Fork

You can find links to posts about my 1st-5th birthdays here: Celebrating 30 Years in 30 Days

I sold my teacher what?!!!


This is for Mama’s Kat Writer’s Workshop prompt #4.) A time you felt wronged by a teacher. I had considered writing about this last year during my Mommy’s Piggy Tales series but thought it may be too scandalous for my nice, respectable, Mommy-blog and instead wrote about the time my grandma ran over my foot with the car. Still the story is begging to be told…

It was around March or April of 1991. I was in 6th grade. I was 11 years old. I had the misfortune of having the same math teacher two years in a row. He wasn’t all that bad and still I wasn’t very fond of him. Maybe because Math was my least favorite subject and my grades were slipping that year.


(Look at that face of innocence! And also that sa-weeeeet outfit ;))

Middle School was the time when we learned what “going together” was all about (sorta). Kids were “going together” and breaking up every week. “Going together” more than 2 weeks was rare and nearly unheard of during these formative years. I myself had already had one other “going together” and breaking up experience so far that year. Now I found myself “going with” another boy. I don’t remember much about our “relationship”. I don’t remember how we got together or how we broke up…I only remember that it happened and was, in the scheme of things, quite an uneventful period of time in my life. The only mention of the “relationship” in my diary was short, cryptic and written 3 months after the fact.

(Names were erased to protect the privacy of those mentioned in my diary ;))

There’s probably more I don’t remember about this experience than what I do remember and I regret that I can’t provide you with all of the compelling details. All I know is that the halls had recently emptied, I’m guessing that the bell was about to ring for the start of class. My boyfriend was in the hall with me and before he left he gave me a quick peck. I’m fairly certain that this was the first time that had happened, yet it happened so quickly it almost seemed routine. I’m not even sure the kiss hit my lips although I know it had intended to. Then he came walking up to me…my math teacher. Tall (in comparison to me), round, balding, and bearded he towered over me with his eyes narrowing at me through his round glasses. He informed me that he had just seen what had happened and would be calling my mother. I wanted to yell that he had kissed me and that I was the innocent victim of a hit and run (which was the truth), but I said nothing and walked with my head down, red-faced and embarrassed into class.

I don’t think my math teacher ever bothered calling my mother because she never talked to me about it, and believe me, she definitely would’ve talked to me about it. I suppose there was nothing to worry about, yet I still couldn’t help feeling embarrassed that my teacher thought me a naughty girl. In fact this very incident may have been what led to the ultimate demise of my “relationship” with Mr. Kiss-and-Run. I bet you’re thinking that this is rather a boring story and so far you’re right. Little did 11 year old me know the irony that awaited me 7 years later.

It was around September or October of 1998. I was 19 years old. I was working in the lingerie department of a very newly opened department store in the mall. Half of our department’s merchandise consisted of respectable sleepwear and robes, the other half of bras and panties and other foundations. Far from being Fredrick’s of Hollywood or even Victoria’s Secret we only carried a few racks of “special occasion” lingerie, otherwise known as…the sexy stuff.


(Me 1998, still the picture of innocence.)

Because the store had recently opened I was scheduled to work with several other cashiers, something that would be unheard of in the future as many resignations and lay-offs would occur. I was standing near the register talking with another girl when I happened to glance over towards the “special occasion” lingerie…
And then I saw him. Looking through the racks of sexy lingerie was my 5th-6th grade math teacher. He didn’t appear as tall since I was now (a little) taller than my 1991 counterpart, but he was still round (although perhaps more round), still balding (although more bald), still bearded (although more gray), and still wearing round glasses.

Before I had a chance to tell my co-worker and then flee from the scene…horror of all horrors he came walking up to the cash register. Suddenly I found myself alone. Where did my co-worker go so quickly?! I took my long hair and threw it in front of my face to hide my features and turned my name badge around to hide my name. I was hoping he would quickly purchase a nice tasteful negligee for his wife without recognizing me (I wasn’t sure whether or not he was married…nor did I care at the moment.). Well, he didn’t recognize me…at least he didn’t acknowledge that he recognized me. In fact I’m not sure he even looked directly at me as I’m sure he may have been quite embarrassed of himself. Embarrassed because, no…he was not in fact buying a nice tasteful negligee. Instead I found myself ringing up a pair of crotchless panties…in size 2XL…for my 6th grade math teacher! (*shudder*) Paying with a credit card confirmed my suspicions that it was indeed him. Aside from me mumbling the purchase total I’m quite sure that neither of us spoke during the whole transaction including any hellos or goodbyes.

He left and I pulled my hair back out of my face which was much redder than it had been 7 years ago in the hallway at school. Once I had a moment to recover from the horror of what had just happened, a smile broke across my face and I found myself wishing that I had his mother’s phone number…that naughty, naughty boy!

Other Writer’s Workshop Posts:
*07-13-11 A bad day: Oh, no he didn’t!
*07-13-11 Has your child thrown a temper tantrum in public?
Create a video describing what happened and how you handled it.
: And so it begins… (Video)
*07-06-11 A list of 10 old TV shows you’d like to make a comeback.: 10 Shows I’d Like to Make a Comeback
*06-15-11 Share a Summer Camp memory.: Youth Camp Stinks
*05-25-11 Write about a time you got in BIG trouble as a kid.
The Newsboys Wouldn’t Ditch Their Friends
*05-18-11 Describe a time when your child said or did something that made you laugh out loud.: Funny Things Adaline Says (Video)
*05-18-11 What was your big dream for yourself when you were 18 and had graduated from high school?: Dreams and Aspirations
*05-18-11 List ten favorite things about one of your favorite people.: 15 Reasons Why My Hubby is Awesome
*05-11-11 Write a love letter to someone (some thing?) you love.
The One That Got Away
*04-06-11 A rule I broke: In School Suspension

Coolest Family on the Block is committed to helping you find creative ways to have fun and make memories with your family all year-long. Don’t miss an idea, tip, or trick…subscribe and have updates sent directly to your email!

Oh, no he didn’t!


I’ve sung my hubby’s praises on this blog before. I’ve told you why he’s so awesome, and showed you cute things he’s done, and the great Mother’s Day gift he gave me. Despite the picture I may paint here (my husband is a lot of wonderful things…but) he’s far from perfect. There are plenty of things that he does that leave me scratching my head or screaming at the top of my lungs…I just try to leave it off of the blog. Today is not one of those days, my friends.

On Friday night Adaline spent the night at my mom’s house. I woke up with a sore throat and decided to spend the day in bed. Cool Daddy had the weekend off so he was planning on painting our front steps and porch. I told him to get a color like what we already had…white with the slightest hint of blue. At some point my mom called to say that Adaline was upset and was asking for me, and since I only live a block away I tossed on some clothes to walk over to my mom’s house. I knew that I’d need to go out the back door so as not to walk on the freshly painted porch…but I decided to pop my head out of the front door to make sure my hubby had his keys. I opened the front door and saw this…
(Insert theme music from Physco here)


And then there was this

And this

Oh, yes. It wraps around the side of the house!

If this color looks familiar to you but you can’t put your finger on where you’ve seen it, let me help you.
Maybe it was here…

Or here…

Or even here…

What the…?

When I opened up the door and took a look at the paint on the porch and then looked at my husband. He had his faced all scrunched up and was bracing himself for an ear-lashing from me. “What? Why? I said white! Oh my goodness…why did you keep painting all of this, you wasted an entire day!” He gave me reasons such as, “It looked gray on the paint chip (??? I asked for white!), I thought it would lighten up as it dried (And turn to white?), I thought I should ask you to come and look at it and then I decided not to (Because your brain fell out of your ear?).

Just to give you a visual of what the previous porch color was…

Yeah, it’s just a tad off. 😉

Even though my hubby was still hard at work painting when I opened the door to this catastrophe, once I had indeed confirmed that it looked awful he was immediately embarrassed and wanted to go to the hardware store right away to get new paint before too many neighbors saw the porch. Naturally I said, “You are never picking out paint colors alone again.” So after stopping by my mom’s house to console Adaline and fill my mom in on the porch paint madness, I…with the sore throat, pregnant, having not showered yet that day, while it was 90 degrees outside…went with my husband to the hardware store.

Before we left for the hardware store I had to take photos…and since my husband was suddenly so embarrassed I hung a sign before we left lest any passerby thought we intentionally painted our porch that color (even though we sorta did).

The note reads:
Yeah, that’s NOT the right color!
(Never let Papa Smurf paint your porch!)

He showed me the paint chip he’d selected.
Yes that indeed looks very gray
(or not at all…and again I asked for “white”)

This is the color that I selected.

And here they are together.

When we got home from the store that evening my husband started putting the first coat on right away. He worked until it was dark out and I think he got everything covered with at least one coat. The next day he finished it up and here it is now…

Tada!





I had him replace the flowers in the front too since I didn’t care for the previous ones he planted over a month ago. I think the petunias look great, but it’s kinda hard to see in this light 😦

Now he has to find a way to get the blue paint off of the bricks so that it doesn’t look as though a Smurf was squashed on our sidewalk.

Believe it or not I wasn’t actually mad, I was mostly…confused.
And mildly amused…mildly.

When I went back upstairs that night before he went outside to repaint the porch he said, “I love you!” and I said, “I love you, too. Thanks for the blog post.”

This post is linked to…

3.) A bad day.
Did you see last week’s Writer’s Workshop post?
Read about 10 (Obscure) Shows I’d Like to Make a Comeback!


Related Posts:
*Large Marge Update 2: Some more stair/porch related stuff.

Lilypie Maternity tickers
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10 Shows I’d Like to Make Comeback


I don’t watch much tv these days. I recently had my heart broken by a tv show and on top of that my basic cable “package”, which only gives us 10 channels, doesn’t offer many options for tv viewing. But whether you have 10 channels or 310 this one fact remains…they just don’t make good tv shows like they used to.

When Mama Kat offered “A list of 10 old TV shows you’d like to make a comeback.” as a writing prompt for this week’s Writer’s Workshop…I knew I couldn’t pass it up.

It’s hard to narrow the list to just ten…and many of the shows that I would pick have actors who have left us long ago. At the risk of being the 126 person to say, “Bring back The Cosby Show!” (and seriously…bring it back!). I thought I’d take a different approach and put out a plea for some shows you very well have never heard of. To give my other favorite shows of all time the recognition they deserve I have listed them at the bottom of this post in no particular order with no additional commentary.

1. MST3K:

If you don’t know what that abbreviation stands for than chances are that you’ve never seen this show. Mystery Science Theater 3000, called MST3K by fans, was a series about a man named Joel who is trapped on a space station by an evil scientist and forced to watch bad movies. Joel created robot friends, Crow and Tom Servo, out of spare parts and to keep sane, Joel and the robots provide “commentary” by cracking jokes throughout each film.

My dad introduced me to the show when I was in high school with episode 312 Gamera vs. Guiron. By the “Hello…thank you!” scene I was hooked. It takes a special kind of person to see the humor behind MST3K and you’ll either love it or you’ll hate it. I personally found it hilarious and I’d love to see it make a comeback. But I only want episodes with Joel. You can keep Mike.

Hello…thank you! Oh so funny!

2. Swans Crossing:

I think I’m one of the five people in the world that remember this short-lived teen drama series that aired in 1992. One of the few actors from Swans Crossing who managed to make it out with her career still alive was Sarah Michelle Gellar who played mean rich girl, Sydney Rutledge. The summer before 8th grade my sister and I would watch this show every afternoon and then play some Super Mario Brothers on Nintendo back when video game controllers still had joysticks. No, it wasn’t near as good as our beloved Saved by the Bell…in fact it was downright awful…but we loved every awful, cheesy, minute of it! For more info about Swans Crossing click here or here

The Swans Crossing Theme Song

You also don’t want to miss this video of Mila’s Birthday Party Invitation (starts at 5:00).

3. Fifteen:

Another short-lived teen drama of the early 90s was Canadian-American teen soap opera, Fifteen, which ran on Nickelodeon from 1990-1993. It was equally as cheesy as Swans Crossing, but with slightly better production quality and a longer run on air. It still wasn’t as awesome Saved by the Bell (what is?), but it had the right amount of drama and crushes and whatnot for a teenage girl.
Looking for a well-known actor from Fifteen, how about this guy right here…
Ryan Reynolds
Ryan Reynolds played the role of Billy Simpson.

Watch a young Ryan Reynolds at work with the ladies…

4. Today’s Special:

Do you remember the Nickelodeon show that ran from 1982-1987 about a department store mannequin that comes to life at night and hangs out with a security guard and a mouse who are puppets? Well, I do! It was called “Today’s Special”. Sometimes the mime was a little creepy, but overall I enjoyed the show as a kid.

Today’s Special Theme Song

5. Danger Mouse:

Danger Mouse is a superhero/secret agent mouse who works with his sidekick, Penfold, and he is awesome! My sister and I loved Danger Mouse as kids. It too aired on Nickelodeon.

Danger Mouse opening

6. Banana Man:

Bananaman was a cartoon short that aired on Nickelodeon in 1983 after Danger Mouse. It’s about a boy who turns into a superhero whenever he eats bananas. I don’t remember too much about it except that my sister and I liked it at the time…probably because we associated it with Danger Mouse, which we loved.
For more banana goodness try here

Bananaman opening

7. Sharon, Lois, and Bram’s Elephant Show:

The Elephant Show was a Canadian children’s show which aired on Nickelodeon from 1987-1994 starring singing trio Sharon, Lois, and Bram. Admittedly I watched much more of this show at 15 than I ever did at 8. I don’t know, I loved all of the kid’s songs and how hokey it all was. I think that lame is fun and cool…so what do I know. And guess what…you can like them on Facebook! 😉

Sharon, Lois, and Bram’s Elephant Show opening

…and don’t forget about Skinnamarink

8. Pinwheel:

Pinwheel was a kid’s show that aired on Nickelodeon from 1977-1990 using cartoons and puppets that interacted with humans. It was pretty awesome. You may remember watching Paddington Bear or Simon in the Land of Chalk Drawings on Pinwheel. Or you may remember the theme song:
Pinwheel, pinwheel, spinning around.
Look at my Pinwheel and see what I’ve found.
Pinwheel, pinwheel, where have you been?
Hello, how are you, and may I come in?
Pinwheel, pinwheel spinning around.
Look at my Pinwheel and see what I found.
Pinwheel, pinwheel, breezy and bright.
Spin me good morning, spin me good night.

Pinwheel opening
(although it’s different than I remember, this is probably an earlier version)

9. Nancy, an operator here at the Disney Channel:

Okay, I know that it’s not a “show” and the Disney Channel is now “free” (for those of you who are willing to pay for standard cable or more)…but wouldn’t it be awesome if Nancy popped up on the Disney Channel every so often trying to sell it to you? My sister and I loved Nancy and I still remember when my mom finally picked up the phone to order the Disney Channel my sister and I were standing right next to her asking, “Are you talking to Nancy?!” I’m guessing it wasn’t her 😦

10. The Office:

I know that this show is still on the air…but being a pessimist and all I’m not predicting a bright future for the show now that Steve Carrell is gone. I hope I’m wrong, but I miss him already!

Apparently I liked a lot of Nickelodeon back in the day and apparently Nickelodeon relied heavily on Canadian and British shows in the 80s. Most of these shows aren’t even available on DVD and that makes me sad. I’d be happy to buy a bunch of DVDs of quality 80s/90s kid’s programming and show that to my kids all of the time rather than some of the junk that’s out there now. We exclusively watch PBS now (then again with only 10 channels we don’t really have other options!).

What are some tv shows you’d like to see make a comeback? Let me know in the comments!

Honorable Mentions of Great TVs Past:
Classics: I Love Lucy, The Dick Van Dyke Show, The Bob Newhart Show, The Mary Tyler Moore Show, I Dream of Jeannie, Bewitched, Welcome Back, Kotter!, Get Smart, and All in the Family.
Family Shows of the 80s/90s: The Cosby Show, Growing Pains, Full House, Family Matters, Step by Step, Saved by the Bell, Home Improvement, and Boy Meets World
Other great 80s/90s Shows I Loved: Perfect Strangers, Who’s the Boss, Family Ties, The Wonder Years, Alf, Mama’s Family, and Golden Girls
80s/90s Cartoons: Muppet Babies, Care Bears, Jem, Rainbow Brite, Strawberry Shortcake, He-man, She-Ra, Gummi Bears, My Little Pony, Wuzzles, Popples, Pound Puppies, Alvin and the Chipmunks, Duck Tales, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Captain Planet, and Animaniacs

Other Writer’s Workshop Posts:
*Funny Things Adaline Says
*Dreams and Aspirations
*Friends Don’t Get Friends Grounded (as an adult)
*15 Reasons Why My Hubby is Awesome
*The One That Got Away
*In School Suspension
*The Newsboys Wouldn’t Ditch Their Friends
*Youth Camp Stinks

Funny Things Adaline Says


Adaline is 21 months old and she talks a lot. I mean a lot. Most of the time we understand her, sometimes we don’t. I can’t really say that she says funny things, she’s maybe a little too young for that. But a lot of things she says happen to strike me as funny because of the way that she says them or pronounces the words.

I recorded one video of Adaline talking about how a goat bit her finger at our trip to the animal park (post coming later). She said a few funny things and was trying to eat her foot and I was laughing the whole time I recorded it and then the camera just shut off :(. So, I turned it back on and recorded some more (the second video below) and then we downloaded them to watch. Imagine my surprise when I find out that the reason why the camera shut off the first time was because it wasn’t recording at all 😦 So I turned it on again and tried all over again, but she wasn’t so much in the mood for it and it’s not as funny as the first imaginary video was. You’ll just have to take my word for it.

So, anyway, here are 8 thrilling minutes (4 each) of me trying to get Adaline to repeat some of the “funny” phrases she says off camera. Enjoy.
(If you are reading this in an email or feed you will need to click over to the blog or click here or here to view the videos.)

A Goat Bit My Finger:


Let’s Talk About the Easter Bunny:

Oh, and she never did say what left green footprints in our kitchen! Maybe next time.

More (funny?) videos of Adaline:
*Happy Mother’s Day: A rousing rendition of “3 Little Fishies”
*Attack of the Giant Baby
*A long trip down Bunnylane: A long wordy post about our visit with the Easter Bunny…but I promise there’s a video at the end 😉
*And so it begins…: The child sassed me, and I recorded it

I’m linking this up to Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop
Vlog: 6.) Describe a time when your child said or did something that made you laugh out loud. I also linked up #1 here and #5 here

Coolest Family on the Block is committed to helping you find creative ways to have fun and make memories with your family all year-long. Don’t miss an idea, tip, or trick…subscribe and have updates sent directly to your email!

The One That Got Away


Monday was Valentine’s Day and I just couldn’t help getting a little reminiscent about “the one that got away” and how things might have been if we were still together. This is the post where all of the ex-boyfriends on Facebook will click over to see if I’m talking about them. Get over yourself, conceited, I’m not talking about you.

Many years back, I fell in love. I fell in love quick and I fell in love hard. It was truly love at first sight and I just knew that we were meant to be together forever. I wanted to spend all of my time with my love. I would spend any amount of money that it would take to be with my love as much as I could as often as I could. And then my love left me. Without warning, without reason, just…gone. I was confused and heartbroken. Was it something I did? Something I said? Was I coming on too strong? I guess I’ll never know.

Sometimes I go awhile without thinking about my love. Sometimes I miss my love so much it hurts. Why did things have to happen this way? Why can’t we still be together?

I haven’t seen my love since 2006. Here are the last photos I have of the two of us together. We look so happy 😦

Oh, Godiva Chocolate Raspberry Truffle ice cream…return to me! I already forgive you and I wait for you with open arms and a ready spoon.

I will always love you.
Jenn